This is What a Guy's Facial Hair Says About Him

Nov 12, 2013 -- 7:04am

I'ts November! also known as 'Movember', where guys grow mustaches to raise awareness for charity. So here's a rundown on what a man's facial hair style supposedly says about him in general:

 

1.  Traditional Beard.  A solid, sharp beard means he's an alpha-male, and someone who's totally comfortable in his manhood.

 

2.  Bushy Beard.  A bushy, full beard can signify shyness or laziness, depending on how it's worn.  It tends to be seen on either granola-eating hippies . . . or men who have given up on grooming entirely.

 

3.  Goatee.  A younger guy sporting a goatee might feel like he's got something to prove.   The goatee is actually best on older men. 

 

4.  Sideburns.  Sideburns are a non-committal style of facial hair . . . not quite a beard, not quite clean-shaven . . . so it could be a man who's still finding himself.

 

5.  Mutton Chops.  A guy sporting massive chops supposedly isn't afraid to express his wild side.  When done right, they can look kind of regal.  But when done wrong, it looks like an animal died on your face. 

 

6.  Chinstrap.  One of the sillier and more pointless forms of facial hair.  He might not BE a creeper, he just looks like one.

 

7.  Soul Patch.  This guy might be nostalgic for the '90s . . . or he might just be kind of a douche.

 

8.  Mustache.  Sporting a 'stache is like having only the difficult part of a beard: it's harder to eat, to kiss, to groom, etc.  That kind of dedication deserves some major props . . . especially during Movember.

 

9.  Handlebar Mustache.  A man with a handlebar mustache says: "I'm willing to groom this thing to perfection."  And it's seen on everyone from grungy biker dudes to hipsters trying to be ironic.

 

10.  Overall Scruff.  Overall scruff could mean a few different things, so you need to be careful.  He's either trying to get laid, or living with his parents.  Or both.

 

11.  Clean Shaven.  Being clean shaven is a boyish look that doesn't exactly scream masculinity or experience.  More than likely though, he probably just doesn't like the way facial hair looks or feels on him. 

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